For those who read…

I haven’t posted in. Awhile and  I’m sorry I’ve been busy with life.
College is hard especially when your trying to fix your life at the same time. 
I find myself sad a lot these days at first I was okay and was coping with “losing” my love. But these days it haunts me.  I know he won’t ever read this blog but I wish he could to see just how much this whole situation has hurt me.  Last couple days have been hard. No sleep for me Ive awaken everynight with terrors. All including him. These days I’m seen as a bad guy. I quit, I gave up, and I walked away. Thats not the case. Do you remember thoses first days of kindergarden when your parent dropped you off and you’d cry because you were walking into a world where you knew no one? That’s how life has felt lately.  I lost a big part of me the day I left. It was like that first day of kindergarden. I cried and screamed and walked into a world where I feel lost without you.  I feel people judging me and I see looks that I get feom your family and friends. This has killed a part of me. It has hurt my sense of love I find myself not knowing how to care and love people as I did before. I pull away from anyone I get close to because. Of the fear of losing them too. So I didn’t quit on you. I quit on my self.

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