Never Gonna Forget

As you know Two Months ago My life changed. The man I loved fell mentally ill over the last two months I have clung to every little bit of improvement he had. Well this week was the worst regression that has happened. I am beside myself to no end on what I can do from here. I was told earlier this week that I could not put my life on hold or wait forever .  I can assure you that when someone becomes ill there is no way for you to have answers on why ? All I know he is safe and sound and getting help that he needs. They were right I can’t put my life on hold. I have no idea what the future holds but it is starting to look up a bit. I am not sure at this point that moving on is the right thing. But living is. There is no doubt that I love him but he is not him and I have no way of knowing if he’s gonna come back. Bout a month ago we were sitting in a doctor’s office and he looked at me and said ” You can’t live like this, I’m sick I’m really sick. “ That was the last real glimpse of him I saw. so I will never forget anything. TO me we had two years of a life together and now if it fades away at least we had that. I know that no matter what I decide someone is gonna hate me. so for now readers no decisions but im gonna explore and see where my life sail boat takes me.  Ima gonna let you in a bit. I will never forget him or anything about him and if he never comes around it will be sad. He was a real fire cracker our first year together .  well Ima hit the hay feel free to read away . I’ll return tomorrow=] 


  1. flowerchild22 · March 31, 2015

    That’s where I feel like I’m at. I’m not ready to move on because I am still awaiting an answer and I won’t feel ready to move on until I have that answer. But I am ready to start living, which is what I am trying to do.

    Liked by 1 person

    • madhatterlex · April 18, 2015

      Dear flowerchild22, I hope to offer you some comfort not sure I will. Some awnsers are never clear. I certainly haven’t any real clear ones. Moving on isnt easy. never will be. I think its what helps you see the real answers to the problems you face. in some cases their may not be an answer everything is different. I used to tell my love everyday that not all problems have solutions. I have come to realize that the greatest life lessons come from the hardest decisons. So make decisons for you because if you wait for untold answers you are holding your self back from living.


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